Way past time to hit the ejector switch for the cos-playing mendacious ‘maverick’


If you’ve watched either of the two ghastly Conservative leadership debates, you’ll know that this country is headed not for any change for the better (as if!), but for a slightly different flavour of awfulness, incompetence and ideology than that which was served up by the liar, Johnson.

I cannot say I am surprised that Sunak and Truss chickened out of the final debate due to be held on Sky. The debates have done the candidates and their party no favours whatsoever and whilst the blue-on-blue scrapping may be delicious to watch for anything-but-Tory viewers, it has reinforced a disturbing picture of rats scrapping in a sack.

Unedifying. The UK is already regarded as a political and diplomatic laughing stock. These insights into just how deeply shallow these wannabe PMs are has certainly not helped to restore our image. Instead, it has served to highlight just how far Johnson’s toxicity has leached into the party, poisoning any remaining pools of integrity, honesty or compassion.

The 358 Tory MPs who now live in fear for their seats (and their salaries) at the next election and the 200,000 odd members of the party are all now staring into the abyss. Watching their potential leaders frantically trying to summon support with the racist and anti-woke dog-whistles, climate emergency indifference/denial, tax-cut/Brexit-bonus fantasies and the ‘I-had-nothing-to-do-with-the last-12-years-of-Conservative-rule’ amnesia is not a pretty spectacle and it looks like it has spooked those with the money…

It wasn’t that long ago that we were (almost) tricked into thinking that a few Conservatives might actually have discovered a moral compass. Silly us! We had only to remind ourselves that the 50 or so who ‘nobly’ or ‘bravely’ quit did not do so in disgust at the hideous policies being pursued, the flouting of international law, the 200,000 deaths of fellow citizens or the endless, wearisome, despicable catalogue of lies. Nor did they quit because Johnson appears to be a major security risk and vulnerable to kompromat.

They quit because Johnson lied about what he knew about the perpetrator in yet another sex scandal and then tried to bullsh*t his way out of the cul-de-sac down which his impulse to lie had taken him. And because it showed, once again, that his judgement was fatally flawed. The Chris Pincher case was, apparently, the final straw… or even the first straw for some who suddenly twigged that the wind direction had changed.

Some cynically collected their ‘I’ve got a spine’ award and then promptly turned to jelly again, going back into posts and acquiescing to the worst and most corrupt PM we’ve (yet) had staying in office as – don’t laugh – a caretaker.

We know only too well that taking care is not an attribute to which Johnson could honestly lay claim (but then honesty never comes into any of it, does it?) unless it concerns himself. So what is he doing with his final weeks as the squatter in Number 10?

Well, not taking care of any of the crises facing the nation for a start. Heatwave COBRA meetings? Nah. Party! Party at Chequers, as was always planned.

Another COBRA meeting today? Nah! Let’s cos-play Tom Cruise and burn up some fuel pratting about in the skies in the middle of a climate emergency.

Oh, would you just look at Boris! He’s such a hero! He got Brexit done, and given another chance, he could get Brexit done all over again! How did we ever think it was a good idea to let him go!

Well. He hasn’t gone, has he? He’s already muttered about making a comeback. He has no doubt watched in glee as his would-be successors show themselves to be dim, inept, superficial, incompetent, ill-informed and about as appealing to the general public as a cup of cold sick.

Who can save the day? Only Johnson the maverick….that’s the story that’s going to be pushed, now. Even if he quits his blinged-up boudoir/bordello for one of these useless former acolytes ( let’s face it, vaguely-decent Tugenhadt has no chance), he’ll be hovering, waiting for the inevitable cock-ups and horror shows that will create a portal for him to step back in, all previous sins wiped clean and memories erased. Think that’s a crazy narrative? You may not have fully grasped the hubris of this man and his overweening ambition and narcissistic world-view.

The country cannot take much more of this democracy-undermining fiasco and it most certainly cannot take another dose of Johnson. The ejector switch must be engaged. Get Johnson gone and let’s have a general election. Put some adults in charge.